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memories…

craig and i got married on september 3rd and moved to illinois on september 9th.
we were 18 & 20 years old.
babies.
he went to school & played basketball… i worked as a temp at the college before and after lauren was born.
between his classes and my work craig was in charge of tiny baby lauren.
such a sweet memory.
when he finished school and got a job, i started to nanny and took lauren with me.
then i did daycare from home when scott was on the way.
we bought our first home.  we fixed it up room by room.
we loved that house.  we filled it with love and babies…we had all of our babies while living in illinois.

this summer we did a little tour of the old places we loved.
it had been a long time since going back there (physically and mentally).

our first stop was The Grove… a nature center.
this was a place i came to ALL the time with my daycare kids because it was free!
i was so glad to see it was doing even better than when we lived here.

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huge tank filled with turtles… lauren used to love this!
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it smelled exactly the same in these buildings.  🙂
it felt a little surreal being back there.
scott remembered it a little but the others couldn’t.
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we had never seen this black smith demonstration before.
they watched him work for several minutes making a nail.
just one nail!
it was crazy to think about how they used to have to hand craft every nail they used.
can you imagine?
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one nail.
five minutes.

 
then just for something different we went to Abt.
there are NO stores like this in kansas.
we killed an hour here easily between me looking through the dream kitchens, the boys in the massage chairs, the free hot out of the oven cookies and this magician.
my kids were totally into the magic.
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we stopped in to see our neighbors from our old neighborhood.
one friend was at work so we peeked in at her job to say hi.
marybeth was so special to me.
she helped me so much with my little ones way back when.
she watched them sometimes, she encouraged me as a young mother and she loved my kids.
we loved being neighbors with her family.
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THIS is where i wanted to go more than anywhere on our vacation.
the choo choo.

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this tiny little diner was my FAVORITE when we lived in Des Plaines.
and it’s funny because back then… we hardly went there.
at the time it was a lot of money for us to spend on a toddler’s meal or with several kids.
so it was more of a special place when we had just one kid with us.
or we would go just for a milkshake but no meal.
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it is very small and it is almost always full with people waiting for a seat.
they serve hamburgers & fries.  they make big yummy milkshakes.  (Oreo is the best)
we sat at the bar because there were too many of us for a booth.
this is a shot of the whole place.
there are three booths in front of the camera that you can’t see but otherwise… that is it.
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what makes this place so fun?
your meal comes out on the train!
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i was loving all the memories from this place so much and then they played the happy birthday song for a little boy in the diner.
and oh man… it was very hard to not cry.
immediately i remembered the last time i had been at the choo choo was for lauren’s 9th birthday.
i think it was just the two of us?
and i got her the birthday cupcake.
they play the birthday song really loud and the train brings out a cupcake.
i missed her very much in that moment.
i wished she had been there with us to see if she remembered it too.IMG_923512
this meal made my whole trip.
and i didn’t even eat anything! ha ha ha
i was just so happy to be there.
i was beaming from the inside out.
so many memories for me of being a mama to those little ones.
and how it feels so different now…  it was so good to go back.
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and then if i wasn’t feeling emotional enough already…

we went to see our old house!
this was our first home.
we moved here in 1998… scott was a few months old.
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we painted it all white… we put in that “garden”… craig built me an arbor for mother’s day that i LOVED… we built the fence and the deck… finished the basement… gutted the bathrooms and the kitchens and made them shiny and new… the four windows on the second story were our bedroom.
i remember taking naps on sunday and laying in bed listening to craig playing with the kids in the front yard.
i spent so many MANY hours on those porch steps watching my littles ride their bikes up and down the street.
i rocked my babies on the porch swing.
it was a great place.
1345 Henry street treated us well.

ahhh… i am feeling a little weepy now thinking back to those days.
life keeps going.
kids grow up.
i am so grateful for that home.
and that guy who i shared it with… he’s pretty rad.

 

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way back when… in july

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i have lots of pictures still that i never shared from our family vacation.
as time goes by i just forget about them.
as we have started bundling up in jeans & sweatshirts & i was longing for summer already.

scott played in a basketball tournament in st. louis with a travel team.
we joined him there and he left with us as we continued on our trip.
we spent two nights in st. louis…if i remember correctly.
the first day we went to the City Museum which i posted about a month ago.

we also did some exploring, shopping and went to the St. Louis Zoo.
it is FREE to get in and it was BEAUTIFUL!!!
Seriously… it was an awesome place to spend a few hours.
if you are going to st. louis you should put this on your list.

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these flowers were ginormous!

my kids went in the building to see the animals and i stayed outside dying over the gorgeous flowers!
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it was extremely hot that day so the misting fans were appreciated… and FUN!
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Annie tried her first burrito of her life at chipotle in st. louis.  🙂
she must have been feeling brave that day.
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we went to Fitz’s afterwards for root beer floats.
umm…. this was more than they could’ve even imagined?!
we let them each get their own!
AND THEY ATE THEM ALL!

after they finished we sat at our table for a long time drawing in our art journals.
me included.
they didn’t want to stop… and i am not going to argue about art time.
so we drew and drew and drew.
it was dreamy.
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annie claims she was fake sleeping but i haven’t seen her sit that still for…. never.
she was out.
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we picked up scott and stopped at the arch on our way out of town.
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we drove to Indiana to meet up with our friends.
we spent four days doing this…
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we almost always go bowling when we are with the Hills.
it’s tradition.
and we are quite a scene in any bowling alley.
no one has ever accused our group of being quiet.  🙂
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scott was taking a hundred close up pictures of people so i moved in for a few….
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jenny beat everyone.
that girl has got skills!!!

there was no place to set my camera for a timer pic so we did this to get us all in one shot.
it might be my favorite from the trip!
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jake and abby had their own bb guns that they shared with us.
the kids set up a tower of solo cups to use for target practice.
sean took his birthday money and bough his own bb gun that week too.
i think i hit something once.
i didn’t have my glasses on….
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bday
sean had his 13th birthday during this trip.
he got to pick where we ate dinner and since he only wanted money this year it was pretty low key.
we picked up a few goodies for him too… joke book, x-men dvd & candy.
i used a few hours of our driving time to make him a card.
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there was also a water balloon fight… wiffle ball…Despicable Me 2… dave’s birthday… kayaking with lola…

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sunkissed and a camera flash… crazy combo.

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lauren chose to stay home this year to work at her job.
we missed being a family of seven.

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fireworks… duerksen kids love language.

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every year when our vacation is over & we are driving away we say, “Those Hills are good people”

true story.
we love spending time together no matter where we are.

hey…. maybe i am on a roll and i will post our chicago leg of the trip tomorrow?!
🙂

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today is my birthday.

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a list of a few things about me right now on my 38th birthday.

* these are my new favorite jeans…. Legging Jean at the GAP
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i probably won’t wear them with heels too often…. but occasionally maybe.

* talby wants me to learn how to do hair like this video.  i promised i would try.

 

* the best book i read this summer was Tattoos on the Heart.
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it has a little bit of foul language but i still LOVED this book… SO MUCH. It changed my heart.  i saw some things differently.

 

* i prefer to eat cake cold out of the refrigerator… frosting that is cold? YES!

* i absolutely LOVE to take a hot bath… in a BIG deep tub.

* coconut is top of the list for smells & taste.  it love coconut dessert!  and the smell… YUM.
the best lotions, shampoos & soaps are coconut.

* i want to see Gravity (clooney… duh) and  i am scared to see Prisoners.  Are you going to see either?

* i think of my dad every time i hear the song Werewolves of London (which is surprisingly often!) because he used to play it for us when i was little.

* i am hooked on the series Homeland

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* my most used app on my phone (besides Instagram of course) is Afterlight.  i use it 90% of the time as a photo brightener.

 

* the top 30 played songs on my iTunes right now

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* i am going to the Lumineers with Mr. Duerksen this week!!


* i like this bedding.

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but i would probably lean towards this style if i was actually buying new bedding. and i would buy it from target…not Anthro.

 

* i want to go to a party like this.  someone do this and invite me to it ok?

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* this movie is going to be so good.

* after i watched that trailer i got sucked into watching movie trailers 30 minutes!

* these are some pretty sweet running shoes….

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* i don’t like to eat breakfast.  i would prefer two cups of coffee and nothing till lunch. i know i am supposed to eat breakfast… and i do.  but i don’t want to.

* i dream about painting.  about being “a painter”.   i do.   but i never ever make time for it.  i should change that.  (someday…)

* my favorite drink at Starbucks in the warm months is a Trenta (XL) ice coffee/4 pumps SF vanilla/extra skim milk/no sweetener

* my favorite drink in the cooler months is a grande skinny peppermint latte (or caramel)

* all of this fabric just came to my door.  (I ordered from Hawthorne Threads.)  they are ALL so beautiful!

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* i am going to buy some pumpkins & mums with my little girlies today.

* this list has become too long.

🙂

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healthy?

i have been wanting to share my workouts and health stuff i have been doing this summer.
but at the same time… feeling nervous to share.
because who am i to talk about health and diet?
what do i really know?

but it was put on my heart this morning during my run that it was time to talk.

because everyone has to start somewhere when it comes to getting healthy.
you may be super tiny & fit and run 20 miles a week and if that is you… you won’t get much from this post.

but chances are… many of you are not and you wish you were.
wishing you were stronger.
wishing you were lighter.  
wishing you had more energy.  
wishing for control over what you eat.

i am just going to share some of what i have been thinking about and doing for me & you can take it or leave it.

and that goes for anything i have ever said on this blog.
i am not your boss.

🙂

OK… back in april when i ran the half marathon… it was really great.
i mean yes i got super sick right afterrds, spending a lot of time in the bathroom.
BUT it was still an truly awesome experience!
i felt so empowered that i really did that.
i really finished!
but then i saw all the pictures & i couldn’t get over that the person i saw in the photos did not match how i felt.
it really bugged me.
i trained and trained for that dang half marathon and i gained weight!
it was not muscle.
don’t give me the old “muscle weighs more than fat” response.
i know that statement is true but this wasn’t case here.

i was eating whatever the heck i wanted…. and running.
so it wasn’t doing anything as far as getting lighter.

and that sucks!
because that was really hard training for that.

i didn’t feel strong physically.
and i felt unable to make any good food choices…. just so stuck in my habits.

then i saw how Rachel was working so hard on her health.
WOW!! i was inspired.
i was following along and wondering what was she doing that was working so well.
#1 she was eating VERY well  and #2 she was working with her brother Jonathon who is a personal trainer.

so i emailed him.
🙂
and we have worked together all summer via email.

he has told me what kinds of foods i should be eating and how often and how much, etc.
and then how to workout.
and guess what?
it has been working!!
i have lost 10 pounds since May.
it’s not a huge amount but it’s not nothin’ either… it’s a clothing size for sure.

i have really enjoyed the accountability of having the emails with him and discussing what to change.
i needed that to keep going.
he has been a great help to me!  Super encouraging.  Easy to talk with.
but there is no secret magic thing in what he told me.
you already KNOW what he told me…. EAT RIGHT and EXERCISE.
but seriously i had no idea what to eat before.
i just ate anything.

bottom line:  there is no magic… you have to decide if you want it or not.

then when you decide you do want that healthier body then YOU do the work.
and it is HARD!
no one else can do it for you.
you are the only one.

Rachel said something that stuck with me all summer.
she said that getting healthy & staying healthy had become a “Non-Negotiable” to her now.
things that are important to us will be non-negotiables.
if we want a strong marriage we have to fight hard for it.
if we want to have kids that aren’t complete brats… we have to do the hard work of parenting well.

anything worth keeping requires HARD work.
so getting healthy…. is NON-NEGOTIABLE.

God gives us one body.
and i want to take care of mine that best i can.

believe me… i fail often.
i eat the cupcake (and then a few more later)
but i am doing that much much less than i used to.
i am still fighting to knock out that voice calling me to sweets practically all the time.
i feel a slave to sugar some days.

(this is the longest post ever)

SO… i have been working at making the healthy choices all day long.

the first thing to change was to be drinking a ton of water.
A GALLON of water every day.
not kidding.

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that is a lot of water!
i have stuck with that all summer long.
at least 5 of those big giant water cups a day.

so that is my BiGGEST tip for you this week.

drink water… a LOT of water.
there is no room for soda and pop if you have to drink a gallon of water a day.

i thought that since i didn’t know how to eat prepare healthy foods… maybe some of you don’t either?

so as often as i can i am going to share a new recipe i find and try.
my favorite snacks & drinks too.

this is my first snack tip…

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of course this isn’t practical to buy all the time. ($$ it’s cheaper than a fast food meal though!)
but i am a busy lady and a somewhat poor planner at times.
so this snack tray of veggies at my Dillon’s stores is a great way to eat my veggies without having planned ahead.
and a fat free dressing would be preferred but it’s not an option so i just don’t eat much of the dip.
just a little.
but hey…. before this health kick… i had never bought a veggie tray unless i was having a party.

and now i eat a whole veggie tray for a snack!
(and it fits exactly in the console of my Suburban so obviously it was meant to be)

and last tip for the week…
get moving.
ANYTHING is better than nothing.
go for a walk.  or a jog.  or do both.
go for a bike ride.
run up and down your stairs.
alone or with friends… or your kids.
don’t be so hard on yourself.
it is O K to not run fast…. it is O K to take your time…. but just get out there.
who cares who sees you!  Go GO Go!
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and if you can….

listen to a good sermon while you are out moving around.

today i listened to North Point Ministries message called Follow: Fearless.  (#19)
i thought it was great.
i was crying… God is so cool.  He has such awesome plans for us.  He knows everything about us.
it was such a great run because of what i was listening to!

i am going to try to challenge myself to find great sermons to share with you often!
(feel free to share great speakers in the comments)

 

SO…. sorry that took so long.
see why i haven’t written it out?
i really don’t feel qualified to be giving health advice…. but we all have to start somewhere.

taking care of ourselves is a NON-NEGOTIABLE.

“God owns the whole works. So let people see God in and through your body.”
1 Corinthians 6:20 (The Message)

 

what do you think?
what do you struggle with the most?
what do you want to change?

 

 

 

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it’s a tradition.

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we try to make it here every year.
we have missed a few times usually because it’s over 100 degrees or there was a drought.
but remember all that rain we have had in central kansas?  20+ inches in a few weeks?
well it caused flooding all over the place but in this case… it was SO COOL!
the waterfall we visit has been dry before and sometimes it has a little stream.

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talby reenacting an old favorite photo of ours…

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LOOK AT THIS!!!

we thought it would have water.
but THIS is unbelievable!
this is in KANSAS!

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It was amazing.
we said a few times that we may never see it like this again…. ever.
kansas doesn’t get water like this.
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i wanted some pictures with lauren since it would possibly be the last time she was with us here.
scott is a character… always joking around.

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WHAT???
look at all those kids in one shot.
i can’t believe that all of those people were in my belly at one time.
craziness.
they are all mine.

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and i get this guy too?
i am one lucky lady.

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kinda creepy how alike craig and scott look….


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It is such a cool place.
And every time it’s different.
i love that.

you can see the other times we have visited this place…..

2012   *  2010   *  2008

there are probably more posts but i can’t find them.
oh well.

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a little tour…

we went to my parents for the Fourth of July this year.
it was a beautiful day!

we went to the pool for a few hours.
i even took a little short nap on the lounge chair!
that never happens.

we had a yummy meal that my mom made for us.
while she was working on the grill i took a little photo tour of my parent's yard.

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it's always relaxing sitting outside at my parents.
they have worked hard to make their yard so pretty.
there are birds everywhere and butterflies.

we ate our delicious summer meal complete with my mom's famous margaritas.


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then we headed out for the fireworks show downtown.
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which turned out to be quite an adventure filled with too many total weird things to list.
but it ended with me calling 911 for an elderly man who fell down in the dark and was bleeding all over.
it was such a crazy 4th!

 

then…. we left these three with grandma & grandpa for a couple days.

mr. duerksen and i drove home after the fireworks show because waffle was at home.
we were so tired… i was trying so hard not to fall asleep… and did fall asleep a couple times.
we cranked up 80s & 90s and were singing loud trying to keep ourselves awake.
and laughing a lot.

time together JUST US is refreshing.
we need it.
it is so nice to have a conversation uninterrupted & not have to think about the everyday things like chores and dishes and making dinner even for a short time.
and also because i super like hanging out with him!

scott is due back from his youth group trip any minute.
and life is back to normal.

and that is good too.

🙂

 

 

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sixteen.

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this month for craft weekend we had all fresh flowers right out of the garden!
i had way too much fun cutting flowers for over an hour.

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some of my favorite people ever were helpers this month!
Pam (my friend who moved to africa and is back for a visit) came to be a helper and she made us THE CHEESECAKE that she created the recipe for!
what a dreamy treat!!
eating pam's cheesecake prepared BY PAM!!! 

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Ashley was a helper this month…we have missed her!!
she is like five helpers in one.
so speedy and on top of anything that needs to be done.

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and Jess stopped by for friday lunch and helped us a little more.  

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Megan drove with a guest and was our helper from friday- sunday.
she was a cooking machine beside kimberlee.

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and we were ready just in time with minutes to spare…when are we going to be SUPER ready with no rushing around?
someday i hope.

we sent out all the swag in the cubbies, at their chair and also on their beds. 

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kimberlee made an amazing "kansas" meal for our first night.
it was SOOOOO delicious.
homecooking. 

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(we even pulled out my grandma's silver platter… she would have liked that)

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margaritas go with any meal.
it's a fact.

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every month its so enjoyable to see the fabrics they put together for their aprons.
everyone's personality comes out in their choices.

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9:30 pm rolls around and the cheesecake is passed out.

having someone bring you dessert WHILE you are crafting… and a cup of coffee… it's dreamy. 

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they rocked those aprons!

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while we stay up late into the night crafting kimberlee gets her beauty sleep so she can get up early and make beautiful coffee cake like this.
what a gift she is to me.
i don't do mornings.

we took our lunch on the road this time so prep was happening before we left for our field trip. 

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at Bearly Makin' It i saw that diet pepsi bottle and had an immediate flashback to being 7 years old and choosing my dad's birthday present.  
i got him a pack of typing paper (he was a newspaper reporter before computers)
and a 6 pack of diet pepsi cans (his favorite drink).
that was the label at the time… i think…it's at least from sometime in my young childhood.
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we ate our lunch at the barn.
on a quilt.
surrounded by beautiful green fields and antiques in all directions.
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B L I S S F U L

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it was lovely…. great food and great company. 

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Megan kept picking and picking….and she kept finding MORE and MORE awesome!!!


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those girls were serious shoppers.

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when we get back on saturdays we get right back into crafting.
Ashley led a craft that required using a saw!
we felt very empowered.  :)

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they worked into the night again making so many beautiful projects.

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these were hanging fabric chalkboards.
aren't they adorable?!!
some used paints pens to make a permanent decorative frames too.
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we made the wreathes again with the Hello from Say Hello Shop.
each group has made them so differently.
and i love them all!
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our purchases were delivered early sunday morning… there was so much…this is not all of it.

i wish that i could get this delivered to my driveway every sunday morning.  :)

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roommate photos!

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setting up for our group photo…

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Erin from wisconsin …………………………….    Julie from iowa ………………………………..


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Beth from kansas ………………………………..   Megan from kansas ……………………………..

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Lisa from wisconsin …………………………….    Kyra from wisconsin ……………………………..

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Pam from wisconsin …………………………….   Heidi from kansas ……………………………….

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Jenn from kansas ………………………………     Stephany from Oregon ……………………………

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Janis from kansas ……………………………….   Kaitlyn from virginia …………………………….

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Pam from africa/kansas ……………………….     Megan from michigan ……………………………

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Ashley from oklahoma …………………………..

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such a kind group of women.
i like them.  
🙂

and i super like our helpers too!

thanks for another awesome Craft Weekend ladies!

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kimberlee makes everyday fun to come to work.

we have the WHOLE summer off.
we don't have craft weekend again until after school starts again.
that is kinda crazy.

i hope you have a creative day today.
i know that my mind is craving creativity deeply.
it's going to HAVE to happen or i may get too cranky for this little house full of kids.

……………………………………………..


if you would like to get on the wait list for future Craft Weekends…

first READ THIS: Craft weekend Q&A

and then get on the list!!

🙂

 

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