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traveling circus

it's taken me all week to write this because part of me wishes i could forget.

it was the trip to end all trips.
(it's a long story but if you read it all you will be laughing (or crying) with me.)
there are pictures at the end…i promise.

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we went to my parents' this past weekend for an early Thanksgiving.
My grandma needed her car there also so she rode with me and craig drove her car.

20 minutes later than scheduled we wrangled everyone into the 2 vehicles.
all the girls (me, my girls, my grandma) in my Suburban.
craig and the boys in grandma's car.
oh yes…and waffle in the kennel in the back with me.

craig and i both get out of our cars twice to run back inside for forgotten things.
we pull out of the driveway…finally.
craig is leading.  
we get to the last gas station at the edge of town.
craig pulls over…needs to fix sean's seat belt.
annie says "i have to go to the bath-frroom"
i park and take her inside the lovely gas station bathroom.  talby shows up too.  

ok…on the road again.  30 minutes late.
grandma and i chit chat while being constantly interrupted by annie.
constantly!
craig hits his brakes.  i look for deer.
he comes to a stop and pulls over….i almost hit him from the back.
his back door flies open and we get a side view of scott's projectile vomit.
i am shocked.
and of course…like i always do at inappropriate times…i start to laugh.
bad mother.
craig throws his hand up, smiles and shouts "first puke of the day!"
(when someone spills at dinner we (try to) say "first spill of the day!" instead of yell)
i get out and help craig clean things up…as best we can.
the wind was so strong everything was blowing around.
scott changed his clothes and calmed down.
i gave craig my package of baby wipes…just in case.
sean announced "i'm going in mom's car!"

we get back on the road.  
veggie tales is crankin' and grandma and i are talking again.
about 10 minutes has gone by…
i smell something.
i ask sean to look at the dog….and oh yes
he has pooped in his kennel and is sliding around in it.
i call craig's cell & he says "i'm going to the station up the road…i'll meet you there."
i am on my own…in the wind…with the poop.
i pulled out his rug and blanket and toss it in the ditch.  
goodbye forever winnie the pooh sleeping bag.
lauren is supposed to have waffle and she lets go…
now we have a dog running in the ditch of the highway,
a nicely dressed woman in leopard shoes cleaning up dog poop with notebook paper
and 3 kids shouting "ewwwwwwwww!!!!"
i get it semi-clean and we get back in….
sean announces "i wish i was with Dad now"
and talby shouts "first POOP of the day!"

we meet back up with craig and get the wipes back!
i think for the first time grandma was happy she'd lost her sense of smell.
lauren is dousing our car with her pineapple perfume and it's even worse than before.
i had to just put my nose into my shirt.

we drove onto lawrence (another 1.5 hours) with no more problems.
miraculously.

it felt like a never ending candid camera episode.
i told my grandma "i dare you to have that much fun on your way home!"

aren't you glad i had no pictures to go with that story?
here are some sweet pictures after all the insanity ended.

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my mom put on a big spread for 20+ family members.
it was all very yummy.  
my cousin came with husband and children all the way from minnesota.
that is so nice of them to make the trip.  i love spending time with them!

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the kids made glove turkeys…very cute.
aren't annie's twin cousins just as cute as can be?
she sure loved h
aving TWO four year olds to play with.

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grandma turned 91 this week and talby helped her blow our her candles.

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thank you for hosting mom and dad.  

my uncles, my father, my husband, my sons, my brother-in-law, my cousin dave….all the men 

were here also but for some reason there are only girls in these pictures?

i guess i should have gone in by the football….

alyssa - I was just searching through old emails for an address that I needed and came across this link that I sent to my mom. I HAD to read it again. That is, quite possibly, the funniest story I have ever heard. I remember laughing so hard the first time I read it, and the second, and the third…
Thanks for the laugh, again.
Oh, and after I read this, we try to say ‘first spill of the day’ instead of getting so frustrated- it always makes me think of this post!

Johanna - i just met your blog today… i’m loving it! thank you for this wonderful laugh… and the tip on not yelling:) i have four boys and this post made me feel not alone in the occasional chaos.

Sara - Megan you crack me up…isn’t life one big crazy adventure????

kim in Camas - ScrapToMyLu - I’m sorry, but I did laugh. Sadly I can totally see myself in your shoes.

Kirsten - Oh I had to come out of lurkdom to say you tell the best stories, but that one, that one takes the cake.

Deb - If I’d have been driving the poopy car, I’d have been the “second puke of the day!” I can’t tolerate dog doo. Simply not. Lol. Even in leopard shoes.

Aubrey - I’m laughing with you. I don’t know what was best, you laughing at the sideways vomit (I would too), Talby’s ‘first poop pf the day!’, or the alliterate pineapple perfume making everything worse. At least you can laugh at it right? Makes things so much better. I hope I remember to laugh next weekend.

Tausha - This story is hillarious! You have a great attitude about lifes little messes!
This is one of those stories that ELLEN would reinact and we would all laugh until we cried!
You really should consider it-sending it in-that is.
Too funny!
Great story! One day you will be so glad that you wrote this down. One day.

Sandy - OMG! That’s so funny…yet not! 🙂 Talby’s “first poop of the day!” cracked me up! I wasn’t expecting that. Although I can’t say that I was expecting anything that happened on your way to Thanksgiving. Thanks for sharing and letting us laugh with you. We love you. (Remember National Lampoon’s Vacation and other movies???….ha ha)

sandi - That is quite an entertaining story.LOL I think most of us can relate to those kind of stories because when you have kids and pets it is bound to happen. Looks like you got it from both ends though(grin) pun intended and yet still kept your sense of humor. I’m sure it was fun telling the story at the dinner table with your family, those are the best stories and only get better with time.

Tami Veer - thank you for helping me laugh out loud today!!! my favorite line: i am on my own…in the wind…with the poop. you are super-mom!!!!!

carrie - oh goodness. i laughed and cried with you on that one! wow, what a great memory though! and sounds like you had a lovely evening after all so all of what it took to get there was worth it in the end.
hugs

callie grayson - i laugh at inappropriate times too! can’t help it, keeps me from crying i guess.
glad the day ending up very nice with family and good food and desserts!!!
sorry that I was laughing the whole time reading your post.

Gwyn - Ha. Ha. Only funny when it’s someone else’s story!!!!

Crystal - oh meg…my favorite neighbor! 🙂 love your stories as always! 🙂 watch your mail box!! 😉

beth - hi meg !!! that has got to be the funniest story i have ever read !!!! i was laughting sooo hard !!! sounds like my life sometimes , like is this for real ?!!! LOL!!!! anyways thanks so much for leaving a sweet comment on my blog – your in my giveaway !!!
xo,
beth
ps. please stay in touch , i am soo glad i found your blog too!

traci - yep, you’re right i am laughing. that sounds like it should have been an episode on some sitcom. the deserts looks wonderful. happy birthday grandma!

carissa - that HAS to be the best story i’ve EVER heard!
i CAN say i’ve experienced flying throw up… but all that other stufff all in the same trip… ugh… i sure hope the wine was OPEN when you arrived! 🙂
a trip to never forget!
CRAZY moments & very SPECIAL moments too!

meredith - I love that this was all done in leopard shoes! You’re all class Meg. Has the smell come out of the car yet? I think this calls for one of my favourite movie quotes: “There’s a smell in here that’s going to outlast religion”.

Juliann - I laughed until I cried; sorry. I too laugh at inappropriate times….

Alyssa - Next time you can give the dog benedryl or dramamine….check with your vet but we were able to give that to our last dog.

Alyssa - Oh My!!! Sounds like the holiday trips we take. We general stay with my BIL and SIL. They are saints becuase I swear we have an average of 3 out of 4 trips one of my children throws up at their house. I have no idea but my kids get sick whenever we travel home.

amy - And I thought it was bad that Marley threw up on our last trip. Luckily we were only 5 minutes from our destination. 🙂 And… my dad gave us some pills for the ride home. I don’t think they make pills for Waffle’s problem.
You are hilarious. All of you. My aunt always says, “We are making a memory!”

foreverfoldinglaundry - Oh. My. Goodness. I laughed like crazy at this! Sometimes doesn’t your life just feel like a sitcom!?!?!

Kelly - oh my! I’m so sorry! wow.
The pictures are really lovely though. What a wonderful time with family. I loved the part where you said, “I really enjoy spending time with them.” For some reason it just hit me that isn’t that the very most important (and enjoyable) thing? It doesn’t matter what you’re doing, an activity, craft, meal, dessert, football, whatever as long as you’re spending time with each other, soaking up each other’s personalities, quirkiness that’s endearing, stories being told, etc.
Kelly
p.s. second is GREAT!!! Wow! Congrats! Thanks for the answer back.

Gini - that is by far the funniest thing i have read in a long time. and yes, i laughed as well when you mentioned your son puking out the car door…..oh well. beautiful ending to an interesting start to your day!

a thorn among roses - we have trips like this way to much! we did the vomit thing only a few weeks ago…yikes!!! and the dog…i kinda hate our dog anyway, but the poooo is, well, poo.
i am laughing too…hard. really hard.

Kambria - I can so relate to this story. I have a post about my dog Maggie on my blog and it sounds very familiar. I decided to take my poor neglected dog with me to Starbucks for a ride and she started pooping in the front seat….I was trying to balance my coffee, shift my car, pull napkins out of my glove box, and catch poop as it was falling out of her…ahem, well you know! Then she freaked out, stepped in it and jumped in the back seat! I can totally relate!
You win the prize with the puke on top of it though! 🙂

Christy - I held up to the vomit story & then lost it. Only because I was just there a month ago with my own child, puking in the backseat with a 2 second warning, one lane country lake road, about an hour from town. Oh yeah!
Thank you for sharing! I seriously had tears of laughter, I had to stop reading in sections I was laughing so hard. Especially at this “i wish i was with Dad now”. *lol*
Glad you made it safely & had a great family get together.

mom - I bet you can’t top that trip to Lawrence – I appreciate that you still come! It seems like there is always some sort of adventure.
I thought it turned out lovely and everyone had a good time.

sarah - I was holding it all in until I got to the dog running in the ditch and the woman in leopard shoes, and I lost it and laughed uncontrollably out loud.
What a trip! Wish their were pictures of all the madness for you to share with us! But the ones of when you finally got there are beautiful and precious.

Blanca - Seriously I am sitting here at my desk laughing. You need your own reality tv show. Funny thing is that sounds like many of our road trips.
Have a fantastic day!

Sandra - What a terrific story — well told. I know it couldn’t have been fun to live it, but it’s realllly fun to hear about it afterwards! Great pictures, as usual.

Jamie Sampson - Only you! PLEASE, PLEASE never let this happen to me! I like you so much!

Sara Ito - Your Grandma is beautiful! She reminds me of mine, they both look so classy and sweet!
That’s good to know that kind of stuff happens to others too, cause I have had all those things happen to me!!

PamperingBeki - Hahaha!! I’m only surprised that it was your family and not mine.
That soooo sounds like something that would happen to us.
And I do laugh at inappropriate times too. haha!
I’m glad you guys ended up with a decent evening after all that!

Staci - OHHHHH!!! I am CRACKING. UP. I can just see it. Gotta love traveling with kids….and dogs 🙂 Looks like it was alllll worth it 🙂

Rachel - Ok I almost spit my drink out! I was picturing you running on the side of the road all decked out running after waffle with a poopy piece of paper in your hand.
How cute is the photos of all the girls. And congrats to your grandma for celebrating 91 years!!!

Tracy - Good morning, Meg! Thank you SO MUCH for making my morning so much better today! LOL I woke up feeling yucky this morning and was here at the office trying to drink some coffee and feel somewhat better to proceed with my day and actually be productive. But thanks to your story (with the hilarious graphics and pictures in my head of all of these things transpiring) I have officially “perked” up and feel that I can get my day on track now! HA!
Seriously, thank you SO MUCH for your daily stories and pictures. Since I don’t live close to you, I live vicariously through you and your family and enjoy the ride (no matter how bumpy along the way). :o)
Thankfully Grandma and everyone involved that day appears to have been good sports and just rolled with the punches – my family would have been in utter chaos and probably fussing at each other the entire trip! hee hee hee
Have a great day and thanks again for sharing! Now… where did I put my coffee??!! Hugs, Trac~ :O)

Brooke - Hilarious! I love the cleaning of poop with notebook paper! A classic mom move!

Liz - Ahhh yes Meg. The ‘sliding in poop’ dog/crate occurance is not unknown in our little family. You have my sympathies. 🙂

chris - Wow that was some trip , we can laugh from a distance huh! oh you poor thing, hey I warned you about adding a dog to the mix , you are officially the super woman , I am still ready to send you my two dogs.

Amanda - Oh. My. Goodness. That is the grossest and funniest thing I have heard ALL day. (its 8:00 am and I have two small boys so give me time) I am SO sorry! I cannot even imagine trying to keep sane amidst chaos such as that. And you managed to save your shoes in the process! I have always wanted leopard shoes. With heels. Instead I wear knock off ugg slip ons. You are a hero.
Many blessings-
Amanda
P.S. You should have your relatives from Minnesota stop by my blog and chat! I am also from Minnesota! About an hour out of the twin cities! And I have two small children. And it appears they do too. And they know you so they can’t be THAT bad…right?

Diana Cornielle - OH gosh! what a story, at least you can joke about it now and look at it this way… it’s a great story to tell the kids when they get older! Great memories! lol. I love your wonderful stories…. lol….I think I would have gone crazy by now! lol. Have a nice day!

MGF - Tooooo Funny. Thank goodness there was no pictures with the story.

traci - ROFL!!! FUNNY, FUNNY STUFF. I have to say….we LOVE our dog to pieces but we have never traveled with him, you are a BRAVE/crazy women..lol
How far did you all have to travel?
The pictures are as always …..FABULOUS!!! I love Annies and Talby’s outfits. Where did you get them???
I adore your blog…not only do you take the BEST pictures but you have a talent at story telling. Please tell us what you CANT do?? 🙂

jennifer - I love it! Thanks for sharing that. I really needed that this morning.
You just gotta love life with kids…

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