if you are a mom you may understand this post.
you know the feeling of clausterphobia? or overstimulated? or exhausted? that’s what i am feeling.
the feeling of “there is no end in sight”
i love being a mom.
i love being home with my kids.
i love 99% of our days.
but everyone needs a break.
everyone needs a change.
everyone a way to recharge.
the problem with being a mom is there is no boss, no paycheck, no evaluations (that’s good most days), no clocking in and clocking out.
but most of all there are no vacation days.
my husband get holidays off. do i? if i had job i would have these days off but they wouldn’t be off they would ON – mommy duty.
when you are at work you have decent hours – not 18 hour shifts of “mooooommmmmmyyyy!!”
Or if we do get a day away….you are paying a sitter so you are watching the clock….just knowing your minutes are precious.
or if your husband stays home so you can go out he will be tired and grumpy from doing “your job” all day.
as moms we keep this “mom guilt” with us all the time. sometimes it is so quiet we can ignore the voice and have fun…like at scrapbooking weekend. but even then we all agreed it took the entire first day for us to relax and realize we were off duty. we can let our guard down then.
AND on our days off we get to do fun stuff like bra shopping or swimsuit torture.
i know one answer to my problem is that the time needs to be scheduled and regular.
being pro-active.
and then that scheduled time needs to be honored by everyone. everyone needs to agree that mom needs space. i would love to hear my family say “have fun on your day off!” instead of “when are you coming back?!”
everyone wins when this happens. so why don’t we do it?
i know that i chose to have all these crazy kids but this is also one part of being a mom no matter how many kids you have – learning how to balance without crashing.
i know that i am not saying anything that hasn’t been said a million times but today it is driving me crazy.
i wasn’t even going to post because i am so grumpy but i thought i want to remember this…i want this to change so if i look back in a year and it’s still like this then there is a big problem – and that would be ME.
see i have bad days too.
Leah - Another SAHM here, and I hear ya sista! I can tell when my temper and patience gets short, that it is time for a break! Not that I ever really get one though, I know just what you mean!
kristin - oh my, oh my, oh my…i know, i know, i know…sunday nite i wondered what i would possibly do all day with my kids so that at the end of the day i felt balanced…not easy…one of my mantras continues to be THIS IS THE LIFE I HAVE CHOSEN…but oh, i wait, wait, wait for bedtime to come when it will get QUIET…and here i am!
i just read what i wrote and i think i am watching too many eloise movies…i sound like nanny who repeats herself three times when she really means it…or maybe i am used to having to say things three times before i am heard!
traci - When I read your blog I just had to take a deep breath. I to am a stay at home mom. Well, I have a part time job but its a job that allows me to take my kids with me so even that doesn’t give me a break. lol.
Anyhow…I have been married for 10 yrs., went into the marriage with a stepson and in one yr. adopted 2 little girls that were under a yr. Talk about a FAST family but talk about BLISSFULLY happy!!! Tonight my husband is taking all 3 kids to spend a month with the grandparent for the first time and I am having anxiety thru the roof!!!! I dont have to hear arguments, complaints, groans, tattles or any negativity. I can do as I please, when I please for the first time in TEN YEARS but I am filled with anxiety at my kids being gone soooooo long and the house being quiet. SO, when as a mom are we happy? lol.
This is probably a way bigger response than you expected for having a bad day but it just made me giggle since I am getting ready to have major freedom and filled with anxiety and ready to well up with tears and they arent even gone yet!!!!