after talking online with a friend today I realized how crabby i really was. I need to spend some real time with God to work this stuff out! I am feeling all a mess.
but even just acknowledging that God CAN handle my moods and feelings made me feel better. I know He can and that He wants to. He wants me to come to Him with everything. He wants me to be a great mom. He wants my children to feel loved and only He can teach me the right way to do it! He is amazing. I just have to ask Him. I have to make that time to hear what He is saying. really listen.
after she and i chatted back and forth i felt WAY better and definitely understood. thank you.
deciding that part of my bad mood was the list i have of things to do and wanting to do it all today – with 2 little kids here. it just wasn’t happening. they kept trying to play with me an i kept telling them to “go play” till finally i had hurt their feelings.
so i threw the list away.
then we played.
we painted.
we made playdoh things.
we went to Sonic.
we went to the park.
we went for a walk.
we did . . . nothing and it was good for me and them.
The chores are changing around here tomorrow.
they are all unaware of what tomorrow will bring.
for 2 years now lauren has emptied the dishwasher each load and scott has put away the silverware.
as of tomorrow . . .
talby will empty the dishes
sean will put away silverware
and the 2 of them will share the job of setting the table.
scott and lauren will share the job of clearing the table and then LOADING the dishwasher.
This is where things will be difficult.
if they cannot work together i guess they will have to switch off who does what.
basically i am feeling overworked? irritated? under appreciated? (all by the kids not by Craig – he’s super)
i buy the groceries.
put away the groceries.
plan the meals.
prepare the meals.
listen to crying and complaining all through the meals.
and then I CLEAN UP the MEALS! (with Craig’s help)
well . . . no more.
(i will have to clean up after they clean up but i am okay with that.)
so be prepared for me whining about their whining.
only the older 3. talby loves it all! she would do all of it on her own if i’d let her.
maybe i should let her!
and i always have one more helper when she needs something to keep her busy.
she kept shouting “Whoa! dat’s a BIG spoon!”
gotta go to bed – it’s midnight!
